2006-07-24 - 12:16 p.m.

So Friday night, I went out with Vita. I didn't really want to, but did anyway. And ended up having a "magical, mystical" (LOL!!!!!!) night. LOL!!!!

After being tortured at the theatre, I got in the car and headed home, dressed in 7 minutes flat, did my makeup while driving, got us to the beach with some very decent parking, were it not for our shoes.

After a series of events (the special oil, the top falling, the police officer's flashlight, the meter), we got up to the "velvet rope". Vita did her "Excuse me, Mr. Doorman" routine (LOL!) and got us straight through the rope. We walked over to Guestlist Girl and, after giving her the "secret password" (Colby - LOL @ "Weren't we on COLBY'S list?"), got our comp tickets and proceeded inside. Got some Cranberry Juice (boo to that bartender!) and commenced to enjoying ourselves.

The craziest part of the night for me was seeing M. Ni.ght Shya.malan all up in the club! LOL! I don't know. They just make him seem so creepy and strange, but he was actually cute and dressed very nice. Smiling and everything. It was funny to me. Especially since nobody else noticed him but me. LOL.

Ended the night after about three hours 'cause our feet just couldn't take it anymore. Besides, the Jersey Boys and wannabe Miami Socialites started to begin to suffer the consequences of their "activities", so everyone started filing out.

All in all, me and Vita had a great time. I'm glad I went.

Saturday morning, I woke up late (10am is LATE, ya heard me!). Headed out to get my little cousin and used my common sense to verify that she still had to go on my way over. She no longer had to go so I turned around and started hitting up the banks. LOL. Tae texted for 1 instead of noon, which I thought would give me more time. Tae then called and said noon instead of 1, so I had to hurry and get my butt composed.

Went and shopped for about 45 minutes, trying on about 5 pairs of pants and 6 shirts, of which I purchased three of the same shirt. LOL. The saleslady was hot about putting all that stuff back but it wasn't my fault. Had it fit right, I would have bought it all. But it didn't. So I had to leave most of it in the store.

Got home and said to myself, "Self, you are wearing this whether you are comfortable or not and that's the end of this discussion. Periot!" Bathed, dressed, accessorized and headed out the door with Tae and Crys.

Got to the Cheese.cake Fac.tory for noonday drinks and the lights went out during the thunderstorm. That don't stop the Cheese.cake Fac.tory though, so we proceed to enjoy ourselves immensely. What a combination - THOSE conversations (! LOL !), 2 Peach Bellinis, 2 Georgia Peaches and 2 Caribbean Coolers.

Never thought I'd have to walk the mall to sober up! LOL!!!

Last stop was Pub.lix for potatoes, mayonnaise, relish and eggs. Tae called me from another isle 'cause guess who she ran into - my momma!!!! LOL. So I hitched a ride home with ma and my stepdad. LOL.

Got home, thought about laying down to rest but decided to instead put the potatoes and eggs on. My aunt taught me to put the eggs in with the potatoes (on top, so they don't get lost) to save time and energy (one less pot to worry about). At this point, it was 5:30pm. I had to leave the house at 7:00pm for the theatre.

My potato salad took one hour from start to finish.

Ran out the house at 7:00pm, potato salad in tow, to head over to the theatre. Kept everything in order over there, ran out that door at 8:15pm, potato salad (minus what was given to the folks at the theatre once they told me I couldn't leave without giving them some) in tow once again. LOL.

Got to Miss E's house in a record 15 minutes. Two hours late, still only the 2nd party to arrive. Ain't that some mess? LOL.

While waiting on Tito to arrive, Miss E drags me into a back room to tell me that she thinks Tito and his fiancee are no more. Sure enough, homegirl did not come to the party. Hmmm. LOL. I was like, "My name Binnit and I ain't innit!" LOL.

Of course, Tito would walk in the door 30 minutes after that conversation wearing THE SAME DAMN COLOR SHIRT I WAS WEARING!!! Could it get any worse than that?! Miss E and Dee were going CRAZY! LOL. They make me sick! LOL!!!

So we played Taboo for THREE HOURS (12am - 3am), all the while I'm kind of uncomfortable because I can feel Tito looking at me and I'm thinking about him and his fiancee no longer being together. It was just a joke all week, but in that moment, the "Whatifs" were tryin' to infiltrate my thought processes. I didn't have time for them though. I was "focused man!" on that Taboo game. "I will not lose!" at Taboo. LOL!

So 3:00am rolls around and Paul (Tito's best friend, who had come to the party STRAIGHT off a plane from New York) is not ready to go to sleep. So, the party continues to Toot.sie's. LOL!

Of course, Miss E and Dee situate it so that I'm sitting directly next to Tito. And I mean DIRECTLY. Skin to skin and all of that. LOL. Tito is being all shy 'cause he doesn't want to give anyone the wrong impression. I tried to encourage him and he held out for the most part until that chick with the big hips and HUGE butt came onstage. He FINALLY gave in and at least went to SIT by the stage.

Meanwhile, I'm gettin' reacquainted (very innocently, thank you) with Ra.But (aka Rabbit - LOL!). I'm not thinkin' anybody noticed outside of the girls 'cause all the guys were by the stage. Guess I was wrong - more on that in the next paragraph. LOL. Homeboy got THAT BODY! DAMN! LOL. The NFL has BEEFED HIM UP! Goodness! But I always saw him as a younger guy, kinda like a little brother. So I couldn't be feelin' all up on him, but even the Lord knows I wanted to!

So it's time to go at 5:00am. LOL. We're walkin' out the club and Tito turns and asks me, "So where do you know him (as in Ra.But) from?" LOL!!!!! I'm thinkin', "How the hell did you see that?!" 'cause I said all my "hi and byes" to Ra.But while the guys were by the stage. Nobody had time to talk to anybody between them leaving the stage area and us all walkin' out the door. LOL.

Too funny.

What KILLED me about the ensuing parking lot situation was that Jorge (who was also in attendance) walked up behind me, gently grabbed my arm and ran his hand down it to hold my hand. Why he did that?!? LOL. LOL!

So we get back to and IN the house (Miss E's keys were not on her. LOL) 'round 5:30am. As I'm tryin' to enter the kitchen area, Jorge is blocking my path by looking in the mirror on the wall to pick up my every move. I caught on and eventually tried slipping between him and the door. WHY did Jorge decide that was when he wanted to do his stripper dance all up on me. And that fool got a big booty. I wanted to slap it and him but everybody was looking so, even though I was, I put on my best "unaffected" act and told him to pay me for my dance. LOL.

I was hungry, so I made me a plate. LOL. By the way, my potato salad was GONE! And I mean GONE. I never expected to see it disappear! And if Tito said he loved it one more time, I was gonna hit him. LOL.

I'm sitting there eating 'cause by now everyone has left. Jorge comes and sits with me, chit-chatting 'cause he was staying over Miss E's house that night. Miss E was tryin' to put me in a spare bedroom by myself but I let her know that wasn't happening. Those rooms don't have windows and that's just too scary for me. LOL. Jorge overheard our conversation and gon' say to ME, of all people and after rubbing his butt all up on me, "I'll keep you company."

Yes he did. LOL!!!

I gave him some kind of sarcastic reply in order to totally distract myself from the image that popped up in my head. LOL!!!!!! That boy just don't know. 'Cause I forgot to mention that he had big hands. Mmmmhmmm, yes he does! LOL. Big hands can work some magic if all else fails.

At that point, I was all flustered and ready to go to sleep. I needed to get in bed and to my dreams, STAT! LOL.

Went to sleep around 6:15am. Woke up around 7-something am and proceeded to attempt to track my momma and her husband down. By 9:00am, I was getting kinda worried so I headed on home in search of. I heard from them as soon as I got to the house (great. LOL).

Called myself laying down but didn't 'cause I wanted to eat breakfast. From that point on, I was on the phone with my bosses at the theatre, trying to formulate a plan to get some programs made since the printer we were using was a flake. Got up and went to the theatre with all intentions of going to Off.ice Dep.ot and having them handle the emergency but the flake called and said she was coming with the programs. I went straight back home.

Called myself taking a nap but Tae called to tell me about Ru's life aka "A Baby Story" (LOL!), so that plan was shot. Got up, bathed, got dressed in 8 minutes flat, went to the theatre. Endured over there from 2 to 6. Got home, ate and crashed in my bed.

Before slipping into Dreamladn, I called David at the point he was walking out of his house to go out. LOL. I always have the perfect timing when I'm calling him. It's like I'm fighting myself not to call him so when I am and he's walking out the door, it's all good 'cause I had no business trying to go and see him and it all worked out that I couldn't. Perfect timing.

For some reason, Damian has been on my mind EXTRA strong the past few days. I've fought myself in not calling him. I even made it to sleep without calling him last night. Unfortunately, whatever happened in my dream woke me up and I grabbed the phone.

While hanging between the unconscious and conscious worlds, I realized that I had the phone in my hand and started to think that it had to be something going on that made me pick up the phone basically in my sleep out of a need to call this man. So, I dialed the number I've been holding in the recesses of my mind for months (I don't know how the hell it stayed in there) and hoped for no answer.

My hope was granted. I didn't even leave a message. I just closed the phone and immediately erased the call out of my recent calls list and went right the hell back to sleep like nothing happened. I just knew that when I woke up in the morning, I wouldn't remember calling.

Woke up this morning and, as my leg slid off the bed, I remembered calling.

Boo! to my memory! LOL.

I gave myself that second to remember what I had done then proceeded with my morning ritual.

As I'm sitting at my desk, my cell starts to laugh at me (my "ringtone" is set to "Studio Audience" when I'm at work). I pick it up, fully expecting to see the name of either of my bosses at the theatre, as I'm sure they have something they must tell me early on a Monday morning.

I should have known. There was Damian, calling me back. Hopefully, he didn't recognize the number and so made the call, then upon hearing my voice on the outgoing message, he knew it was me. I guess that's what happened. He didn't leave a message.

I think I'm going to call him again tonight. Something is driving me to speak to him. I don't know what. I have no "feelings" for him but I couldn't ever forget his purpose in my life, even if I ever really wanted to. And for whatever it is to bother me so much to speak to him, I guess I better give it the good ol' college try one more time. At least I won't be like, "Maybe I didn't really try." I'll know I gave it all I had to get in contact with him, that he must not want to speak to me, and I'll leave it at that.

Other'n that, the weekend was pretty quiet. Which means it wasn't quiet at all 'cause I detailed just about every minute of it. LOL.

I'm supposed to be going up to Orlan.do this Friday afternoon. Tae is having a housewarming party so me and Crys are heading up. I haven't told D yet. I'm just gonna spring it on her. She's gonna be hurt but I need to get away. I'm also gonna let her know that for the month of August, I will be straight chillin'. No need to even call me about going out. I will be enjoying a bunch of Friday night movies and working out on Saturday nights, if I can't find anything else to do. I'm ready to just sit my butt down and relax.

Also, this morning, I was thinking that I want to lose upwards of 20 pounds this August. For real. It can be done. And I really want to do it.

I'm thinkin' working out in the mornings for 40 minutes, walking/jogging at lunch for 40 minutes, jogging/weight training at night for 40 minutes. STRICT diet. 30 d ays. I can give that to myself, right? I mean, it's just food, right?

Isn't this what I've been saying to myself for 16 years now?

Yeah, it is. But this time, I'm really gonna try. I believe it's possible for me to do it. I just have to do it.

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