"You are amazing, God."
Sunday, Mar. 26, 2023 - 5:44 p.m.
It's Day 8 of my Fast experience.
These past 2 days have been so....peaceful. I'm so grateful.
I've been my own company. Hours upon hours in bed, sleeping or reading. Some listening to music. Went to the beach for just 2 hours yesterday afternoon.
I needed this. More than I knew, I needed this.
Whew. It feels like an exhale.
There were some that needed me to do XYZ. I didn't respond. Normally I would. It felt like they sensed I was taking time to myself, like it was their cue. Well. They have to wait. There were others that wanted me to be here or there. Sent messages for me to come. Well, my presence must have been missed.
This was my time. Had to reclaim some.
"Love at Christmas Time" by Reuben James is playing as I type this. He's fighting against the sound of my washing machine. ☺️ After lying in bed reading all day, finally got up and put a load in. There are 2.5 on the floor in front of me, still to go. I'll get them done.
I wish every day of my life could feel this way.
Spoke with a guy I work with through another agency on Friday. Wrote about him before. He's moving to Georgia. He said about Miami, "Everybody here is in the fast lane. I want to coast." I felt that. There is a hustle energy here that sucks you right on in. You don't realize you never stop until you have to stop. The Miami of my youth was much slower, almost country. Those days are long gone. It's about to be dog-eat-dog here soon. I need to cultivate these peaceful times in my life more and more so I don't get sucked in again.
I am starting to matter to me. It's a long road ahead but it's what I want. I want to matter to me. I want my happiness to matter to me.