2007-02-14 - 5:59 p.m.

I'm just not feeling Valentine-y this Day. Not at all.

I recently got chewed out by the Big Boss Lady for not reading some guidelines I was supposed to read since last week.

To be truthful, that's just me being defiant because I don't feel like readin' them guidelines outside of when I'm at work even though that's just how it's gonna have to be because I don't have time to read them while I'm at work. So, yeah.

I ain't read the guidelines so some information I was responsible for distributing was incorrect. But at least I don't feel terrible because two other folk who are over me had the same understanding of the incorrect info that I had. So we were all looking crazy together, not just me. :) LOL!

I guess it helped that I'd been having a very happy day up until that point. It's still pretty happy - I'm just not feeling Valentine-y is all.

I have to LOL because I guess the chewing out was pretty rough. A couple of my coworkers came to check up on me and make sure I was alright. They were rubbing my back and making sure there were no tears in my eyes. That kind of behavior only made me want to laugh at the whole situation even more. It was hard enough not laughing in the Big Boss Lady's face while she was going off in the first place.

To her credit, she didn't yell or scream or get offensive, although I didn't too much appreciate that "playful tap" with that piece of paper on my head...

Yeah. My momma don't even do that.

That was the only time during the "lecture" that it was hard for me to keep my inner Booquanisha in check. Other than that, I did the whole "nod" and "mmmhmmm" thing and let her get her load off her chest. Hopefully she'll go home to her husband in a happier mood tonight.

For me, this whole episode is significant in that earlier today, while out on a run during my lunchbreak on behalf of the theatre (it will NEVER end!), I encountered a dragon fly. I laughed and smiled at the memory that little insect triggered:

When I was in elementary, my cousin and a friend strapped me into a pair of rollerskates and attempted to teach me to ride along the side of my house. I was petrified to be on the things in the first place, being the (recently acknowledged) control freak that I am. I screamed everytime I THOUGHT they would let me go.

Finally, I was comfortable enough to take a couple of rolling steps by myself. As they watched with pride, I happened to look up and notice a large flying being approaching me head-on...

I FREAKED! I went into a complete and total panic and started to flail my arms WILDLY. LOL!!! Of course, being new to the whole rollerskates thing, I was not too solidly planted on the ground. So of course, I lost the little footing I had and messed around and hit the ground.

Which wouldn't have been so bad had I hit the ground about a foot to the left. Nooooo, that would have just been too easy. Instead, I landed on a cement square that served as part of the walkway to the backyard.

I had to sit out of PE for over a week. I don't even know I made it through class.

I laughed today because I was SO AFRAID when I saw that dragon fly approaching me. I just knew it was gonna get close to me and decide to bite me and poison me and make me die! I just KNEW IT! And what ended up happening? I ended up hurting myself more than that little bug ever could have imagined hurting me.

I need to let go.

That is the lesson I'm hearing when I think about how I laughed at that dragon fly entering my line of vision.

It's time to let go.

It is time to let shit go.

Periot.

Well, the whole work situation just worked itself out. So I'm cool. I wasn't ruffled before but as of now, I'm real cool. :)

And I'm STILL not feelin' Valentine-y.

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