Sunday, Sept. 05, 2021 - 11:59 p.m.

Today is Sunday. I AIN'T DO SHIT.

I'm starting to feel like I'm wasting days again, so I gotta get myself together. Of course, wasting a lot of time on social media. So time to take another break. I have no discipline. SMH

Proud of the ways I've maintained my boundaries as it relates to my aunt. Her daughter's memorial is this coming Saturday. My other cousin got herself involved in planning it. I purposely did not. So now she's overwhelmed and trying to get me involved. I told her outright that I am intently staying out of all of this and also managing how much energy I give to my aunt. I will do what I want when I can. Other than that, I'm not driving myself into the ground. Again. I'm just not. Folks ain't gon be happy about it all around but I have the peace I need about it. So. Oh well.

My friend group is going to Mexico this week for one of their birthdays. I found my way out of going. I don't feel comfortable getting on a plane in a pandemic. People are doing it all around and escaping unscathed. I just don't feel like taking the chance. Walking into a store is enough for me.

Sidenote: My smell/taste is all f'd up at the moment. Went away completely earlier this week. I ran and got tested for the 1-9 - negative. Thank God. Not sure what brought this on but it's annoyinnnnggg. And also amazing from the weight loss perspective. I'd definitely slip into depression if this didn't get better but boy, the weight I'd lose. There was one meal, I completely had no appetite once the taste of the food did not make it to my brain. My brain told my stomach NOPE. My appetite decreased overnight. For real. Like, my stomach is coming in. LOL And this has only been a couple days and my taste is back to about 70%. So yeah, the weight would definitely be rolling off i I lost my send of taste/smell altogether. It's really unbelievable to experience.

I've been getting examples that are helping me better understand the need to have a vision. And how different life would be for me had I ever had one. But it's never too late. So I'ma get on that. Starting with my house.

Ok, that lil statement kicked my butt into gear. Had some final furniture in a cart on wa.y.fa.ir. Just clicked the "place order" button. So that will be here soon. :-D It will feel so good to finish furnishing my freaking house! Whew!!!!! It's my mom's room and completing my office room. I think I'm ready to start decorating in earnest, so being fully furnished will help.

I am so in love with my closet in my room. Finally finished washing and hanging up all the clothes that were in my office room. Feels good to be done with that outstanding project.

I'm moving along. This is the year of progress and I am all about it.

Cut the cable cord a little over a week ago. I don't need all this tv anymore. Always had it just because I've always had it. My mom watched it when she came over but when she is home, I'm not watching it. So why was I paying so much for it?! SMH Cut that cord and will be saving $80 a month. I'd previously cut a music streaming service that was more than $10 a month. So I'm saving almost $100 a month. Crazy. There's another $45 for parking at the office that I've been paying all this time for nothing. SMH. Finna cut that this week.

I'm ready for a new car. I think. I wouldn't mind one, it's just that my car works the way I need it to... Kinda don't want the expense of a car that's just going to marinate in my front yard. Let me pray about it chyle.

My tire did get a nail so I had to buy a new one. I still have to stop and catch up to a lifestyle of not having to fret about money. Then I look back and realize it's been this way for a lil minute now. It's weird. So weird. But I like it here so I'm staying here. No going back. Struggle is not my portion.

The rash I have is spongiotic dermatitis. I think it was triggered by the stress my body went through when I was on keto and trying to develop a kidney stone. *sigh* Got those results on Thursday, so at least now I know what was going on with me.

I have two steakhouse dinners set for this week. Outside of that, I'm going to do better about my eating. I am getting back comfortable with throwing together a good smoothie and my stomach is loving them. I am a sucker for a delicious breakfast so that is something I have to work through in terms of dscipline. Also promising myself three easy workouts this week. Periodt.

Ok, finna get me some sleep. Looking forward to writing at least once a week.

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