Monday, May. 23, 2022 - 2:59 a.m.

Writing this while lying in bed, fresh off almost getting beat tf up.  Or something.

Went to visit new(never) frand. It was going to be a clean visit and that was well-known. His schedule is challenging (along with every other aspect of his whole life, as stated previously). So I drug myself up to go chill with him for a lil bit. We were chatting and cuddling like freshmen in high school. What was supposed to be one hour turned into 2.5.

Just as I was getting ready to leave, there was a ring at the door. Hmmmm. Quite late for any visitors. This should be someone expected. Homeboy ain't move. I was like ummmm, that's the ring doorbell, right? He said yeah but his dogs were not barking. So I said well you have the camera, you can check on your phone, right?  "Nahhh." Hmmmm.

So two things: 1) his weedman was trying to coordinate a sale and 2) he had told me all about his brother and the brother's romantic dealings with a neighbor and that the brother was currently out of town. Back to the story.

He didn't seem alarmed that someone could be at his door late at night. That was strange. His phone had been ringing off the hook (in hindsight). I'd even mentioned it to him. He said it was the weedman trying to get him to come get the stuff. So then I started thinking it was the weedman.

He went to go to the door and said he was going to let his dogs out so they could probably scare whoever was at the door. He told me "don't come outside". So I sat still. Then I started hearing the dogs barking, the front door opening and closing. Hmmmm.

After a few minutes, he came in saying it was the neighbor his brother was dealing with. I was like but doesn't she know your brother is not home? Like, his car shouldn't be in the yard if he's not home. And from what he said, the neighbor watches to see who is coming and going. So she should know full well the brother ain't home. He said the neighbor saw my car outside and thinks he is lying, trying to cover for his brother.

That's when the gears started clicking. Cause at that point, the dots couldn't do nothing but start to connect.

He said sorry for the scare, everything is okay, nothing to worry about. Then he went back towards the door.  As he was walking towards the door, I started to hear knocking at the window of the room I was in.

Chyle, that was my dayum cue! Realized I was in a whole hood odyssey for a part I did NOT sign up for.

He went back outside with the dogs to chase her from the window. I heard faint yelling from way outside. There were bags being moved around in another room. I locked the door of the room I was in because I said if she comes this way, she ain't getting in here.  Unt unh. Grabbed my keys and phone and waited.  About 15mins went by. I text him that I needed to leave, no response.  I called, no answer.

About 5 more minutes passed then he came inside. He knew I knew so there was really nothing to say. I said I need to leave and need some assurance I can get to my car. He wanted to go talk to her first (probably to try and convince her to leave before I came out). I said I'm being held hostage at this point. With that, he said he'd go to her car (!!!) so I could get to mine.

When we walked out, the lady was sitting in her car right behind mine, ok??  I'm like LORD. He walked directly to her car just as she started to get the door open. I could hear her cussing his ass out but my focus was getting in my car and outta there. Of course, under duress, you can't hardly get the car started. Took 4 seconds longer than I wanted to but I got that car started and swerved onto that street so fast. I put my NASCAR driving on to get away from there.

I am forty-freaking-one years old. Why am I speeding away from a domestic dispute I didn't know I was a part of at 2am?!  WHY?

My God. I am grateful for his protection and for getting out of there with my life. Anything could have happened, especially if that lady had a gun. Like, what?!?

And that was totally unexpected because we've talked about his previous relationships. He even asked and told me he had no stalkers. But I guess if she's his girlfriend, she's not a stalker. And ain't no neigbbor when she's sitting in the car in front of the house. She didn't walk over from next door.

Like......?

It's unfortunate. We had such a great time tonight. Even told him I appreciated his respect for all my boundaries/limits. To then turn around and have this experience. Wow.

Sad thing is I pushed myself waaaay outside of my comfort zone in even entertaining this man. Nothing financial or physical or even educational matched up to what I would want. Not one thing. Then all his different situations... I tried to cut this thing off last week and he insisted we had to give it a chance. For what? For freaking what? For fun? That's it? Could've lost my life so he can have fun.

My God.

Well, today's lesson was certainly that God wants to bless us with the desires of our hearts. If it does not align with my desires, I'm not entertaining it. And that's on period. I tried it this other way and learned the hard way. Don't have to tell me NOthing twice!

The other lesson was exactly what I employed: take it slow. I didn't let anything happen, exercised great restraint. So he got nothing out of me that would leave me heartbroken, sad filled with shame or in danger ('cause ain't no address). This is a clean, clean break and I am grateful.

Still stunned that this happened. What in the world?

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