"Mental and physically, I love how you're doing me."
Wednesday, Jul. 14, 2021 - 11:21 p.m.
I caused a car accident on Saturday. T-boned another car. A lady and her son. Gosh, writing it makes me feel bad all over again.
Thankfully, nobody was hurt. I had my mom in the car! It's always our greatest fear, to get in an accident with her in the car. But because we had no idea it was coming, there was no bracing ourselves. I do believe that's what resulted in (at least) our lack of injuries. I was also coming off a side street at a slow pace, thank goodness.
Both our cars were damaged but driveable. Hers, on the passenger side; mine, smack across the front. I hate that I ruined her afternoon, her next few weeks, etc. Truly hate I caused that.
I've prayed and have asked others to pray that her insurance doesn't go up. That was her main concern - that her insurance would go up. I'll keep praying it won't.
I knew at the scene that therapy is definitely working for me. Before, I would have been beating myself up for making such a stupid mistake. I would have sunk into those thoughts and taken way too long to come out. This time, I forgave myself in a few minutes. After I realized what happened and saw that everyone was okay, I knew I had to forgive myself. It was a mistake. An accident.
I was on the scene, thinking to myself the experience should teach me compassion. Because I was apologizing profusely to the lady but she still looked at me as if she could punch me 10 times and not get over the feeling of being upset.
I've been in accidents that others have caused. It's never been a good feeling and I've definitely been super aggravated by their carelessness. So I can somewhat imagine what she feels. Like, I said, I just pray she is not financially impacted by this accident.
As I'm writing this, I'm thinking about the few accidents I've been in. Two resulted in my car deemed a total loss. It's a complete blessing that I've never been hurt in any of them. Thank God.