Tuesday, Jan. 05, 2010 - 8:21 p.m.

*sigh* �I love my family but boy, oh boy. �You can�t be dependable with these people. �They know they can depend on you, they will ALWAYS depend on you. �And I love to be able to do things for them, I truly do. �It�s just that it seems when I need to just sit and just be THE MOST, that�s when they come up with an emergency! �And of course, it�s never planned but really, it really seems that way! �OMG!

Yesterday, I had it in my head all day that I was going to go home and have a leisurely evening. �I had things planned for myself that I wanted to do and I was ready! �But no, I get off work and get an URGENT call that my uncle needs a ride from work. �Now this is my uncle that I love dearly, so under normal circumstances, I would not even bat an eye to help him.

HOWEVER, his wife is a crazy person so for her, I want to do NOTHING. �She is a liar, a schemer and a user. �Always has been, always will be. �So when I hear her voice on my voicemail, TELLING me what I need to do, 1) it makes my skin crawl and 2) I don�t want to do it, whatever it may be.

To make a long story short, after going home to eat, I came back out of my house, drove out of my way to pick my uncle up and drop him home, then came back home. �It just sucks when everybody just KNOWS I�m going to be there to take care of every situation. �When stuff like that happens, it makes me want to move away. �Like, how �bout ya�ll take care of ya�llselves and see what that feel like? �I ain�t got nothing to stay here for now. �Might as well make a move�

I�own know. �It just rubs me bad that folks always depend on me. �But if I need something� �Chyle, I won�t even get into it right now. �*smh*

So I got home and decided to stick to my commitment to go work out. �I was going to walk outside but it was so cold last night, I decided to hit up the gym in my building. �I got all suited up, gathered my water bottle and towel, and hopped on the elevator. �As I stepped off in the lobby, I noticed a young man with a woman. �He was all hooded up but I didn�t bother to look up. �Just stepped off the elevator and kept it moving.

The gym was occupied, but not busy like I was expecting. �I guess the New Year�s resolution folks had already come around 5. �Wasn�t nobody in there with me but the usuals. �I got on the elliptical with plans for an hour workout but my back wasn�t tryna hear that. �I�ve gained a couple pounds in the past month or so. �My back always seems to notice and starts revolting from the strain on my frame. �So that hour turned into 30 minutes. �I stepped off the elliptical to refill my water bottle so I could set up residence on the stationary bike. �Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that the hooded dude from the elevator was up in the gym. �Hmm, what a coincidence. �Right�

So I�m going to get my water when I hear, �excuse me, can I talk to you for a minute?� �Come to find out, this fool saw I was headed to the gym, came over and waited for me to get off the elliptical for about 20 of the 30 minutes I was on it. �I just don�t even� �I mean, that signals STALKER to me, ya know? �LOL �So anyway, he sat and talked to me for about 20 minutes while I rode the stationary bike. �Come to find out, we �went to school together� for undergrad while he was there (he got kicked out).

Thing about it is, I was not attracted to him at all. �I�m sure he�s attractive to somebody out there � nice smile, looked clean, nice clothes, city-boy wicks (it�s a hairstyle. �LOL), golds, etc. �Your typical �Miami nigga�. �But I just�didn�t find him attractive. �He just didn�t do it for me. �Especially when he told me he lives with his grandmother and plays semi-pro football. �Ummm, no. �Not interested.

But he gave me his number so I�ll call him and be friendly. �Can�t hurt. �I read online yesterday that somebody tried saying yes to every guy that approached her, so I think I�m going to try that too. �At least get some dates out of it. �I wonder if I can make it through while being celibate. �Yesterday made a whole month, by the way. �30 whole days. �Let�s try to get to 60�

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