TheForest.Diaryland.Com

"I wonder, I wonder.... You gotta feel meeeee, ooh yeah... I could love you good, I..."

Wednesday, Aug. 13, 2008 - 2:29 p.m.

So!

I feel MUCH better. It's crazy what a difference a day makes! I'm over that caffeine withdrawal for the most part. NO headaches (thank the lawrd!), the nausea is just about over... I still have some muscle cramps but until I get some potassium pills (supposedly) that ain't goin' nowhere fast.

It's so weird when you feel your mind switch. Like, when there's been something you've been trying to do forever but your mind just wouldn't get with it. Then, all of a sudden, your mind just up and decides to put itself to it and, voila, what you've been trying to do for so damn long with no success is all of a sudden a damn piece of cake.

Weird.

I think it also has to do with me finally getting to a point where I feel like I have nothing to lose by losing weight.

Before, I was afraid because I didn�t want to be desired. Ishas, I know. Oh well, I�m me, that�s all I can be. But yeah, I didn�t want any man ogling my sessy body, so I decided that the weight didn�t really bother me.

However, the combination of me wanting to be desired, being desired at any and all weights, and the fact that my weight has gotten to the point where it�s a detriment to my quality of life� Yeah, I have nothing to lose but weight and everything else to gain. So it�s what I�m gonna continue to do.

I�m wondering if I�ll even look at weight loss or just measure how my clothes fit differently. I haven�t had a chance to properly weigh myself over the past two days, one, and two, I just don�t care about the numbers that much. I just know there�s a way I want to feel and look when all is said and done. Yeah, maybe I won�t focus on the numbers so much in the beginning and just worry about working on getting into the shape I want to be in.

So anywhoo. Tired of writing about this subject already. LOL. I�ll find something else to focus on soon enough.

I'm still up in the air about Esper.anza Spal.ding. Maybe I'll just (finally) go see The D.ark Kni.ght instead...

the last - the next

The Trees Today - The Trees I've Seent. - Diaryland.


The Last 5 Trees
"Until the end of time, I'll be there for you. You are my heart and mind. I truly adore you." - Sunday, Oct. 30, 2016
"Don't touch what's there...when it's the feelings I wear..." - Saturday, Oct. 08, 2016
"I will enter his gates with thanksgiving in my heart, I will enter his courts with praise." - Friday, Oct. 07, 2016
"I tried to run it away. Thought then my head'd be feeling clearer...." - Tuesday, Oct. 04, 2016
"Boy, your money and my money? Ain't the same damn kind. I can live your life and my life AT THE SAME DAMN TIME!" - Sunday, Oct. 02, 2016