2007-03-27 - 9:34 p.m.

I give a lot of advice about being able to admit your problems to oneself.

I don't feel like a hypocrite 'cause I admit shit about myself all the fuckin' time. I am an open book. Periot. Most of the shit I write in here, I have admitted that shit to at least one other person.

And it's not that I'm mad or angry about anything right now. I guess I'm just reminding myself of why it's so easy for me to give the advice that I do and to be able to believe it myself. 'Cause I know that shit is the truth. I have no blinders on when it comes to me.

So I ended up sitting for 3 hours at the auto shop today to get some work on my car finished up. They came at me talkin' 'bout the part they put in didn't fix all the problems, I'd have to get more work done on my car. Come to find out, they had ordered the wrong version of the right part and that was the doggon' problem. So now, I have to do some ghetto shit just to get my car out of Park.

But at least now I have air conditioning.

The story of my happy life. 'Cause I'm happy as of this moment. I am.

I'm just feeling a little stretched. Ironically, stretched by my family? How did that happen?

I guess I too happily made the announcement that I was kinda through with the theatre so everyone is pulling out their requests that I guess they've been sitting on and I'm getting calls everyday, left and right.

I'm tired right now. But at least I'm not completely stressed.

I guess that's coming in April when my coworker leaves for his new job.

I'm getting a Pa.lm Tre.o 680 tomorrow. I don't wanna go to sleep. I just want to stay up all night and not go to work so I can be home when it arrives at my house. TOUCH SCREEN!!!!!!!!!!!! Ahhhhh......

No, I don't need one. But I got it for $39.99. And it's got a TOUCH SCREEN!!!! Ahhhh.... And it records good quality video. And it has a nice organizer.

I'm just preparing myself for the future.

TheBouncer comes to town this weekend for his birthday. He gets in on Friday, at which point he's taking his kids to The Fair (be there!). Saturday, he wants to hang out. I'll probably be the only one to celebrate his birthday with him. I'm going to take him out to dinner. He likes Ol.ive Gard.en. We'll see.

So my 'rents are gonna be out of town this weekend. I could easily sneak him into my house. But I don't wanna fuck. I just don't feel like it. The only reason I would want him here would be so I could sleep through the night - 'cause the world knows I can't sleep through the night in the house by myself! My dog Noah ain't no comfort - his ass be as scared and jumpy as me!

Besides, I miss being snuggled up under TheBouncer. I just don't wanna fuck. So I probably won't let him in. Then again, maybe I will.

I just have never let him know where I live so this would be opening my space to him. Do I really wanna do that? Nope.

But I do want to get a full night's sleep. I really do.

I'll see.

I wanna get HIGH HIGH HIGH but I don't wanna call David.

Speaking of former weed-men/potentials, did I mention that Reggie now has a pregnant girlfriend? Can't remember if I did but either way, that means he's not an option. More specifically, 'cause I heard his pregnant girlfriend say, "When I get home, I'm gonna ask Reggie about...", leading me to believe they now live together.

Which brings me to a thought I had when I found out she was pregnant: Homegirl must be an undercover FREAK. 'Cause Reggie can get a lil' freaky, nahmean? Yeah, he can get quite a bit freaky. And she looks so nerdy(?), I just can't see it in her. But she's gotta be 'cause I know how Reggie is and I've heard he is really feelin' his girl.

I'm happy for 'em.

I'm ready to run. I wanna go see a hypnotist who instructs me to not be able to function without a 3-mile run in the mornings. I wanna run for 3 miles in the mornings. Basically, I just want to learn how to need to run to live. I want to have this terrible need to run. This complete and absolute desire to just pick myself up and RUN!

I swear!

I guess I need to use that $50 spa gift certificate and get me a massage. I was even thinking about acupuncture...

I'm happy that I'm starting to feel a little happier and more at peace these days. It's really starting to feel great. I'm feelin' it. I'm happy.

Tomorrow is gonna be hectic. But it's all good. Just another day.

I got approved for a new car loan. All by myself. No cosigner. But I don't k now if I'm gonna commit to selling my car... LOL! I'm always jumping to conclusions about my dern-self.

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