2006-09-07 - 4:51 p.m.

Absolutely nothing is cracking these days. Absolutely nothing.

I don't have anything going on.

And that is SO fine with me.

As of right now, TheBouncer believes that I just don't want to talk to him anymore, and that is fine with me. Although, I will give him a call just to clarify things. But I am more than happy that that situation is about to be over and done with.

I haven't been to the theatre in a couple of weeks and I don't see myself being there either. I'm probably gonna sit down with one of them early next week and lay it on the line: I am taking a break.

I know they're gonna FLIP 'cause they have all these plans that include me. But guess what? I just can't do it anymore. Not for a while at least. I don't want to do it anymore at all, but I'll give it the benefit of the doubt and leave it open-ended. But as of right now and for about the entire next year? I'm taking a break from that place.

In less than two weeks, I will be hitting my 4-month anniversay of being celibate.

Wow. LOL!

I just didn't see myself being able to be celibate. But really and truly, it's been a breeze. And a much appreciated respite. I do have urges. TRUST ME! LOL. But they're manageable and controllable.

Besides, I have been reading so many books, I haven't had a chance to really just lay up and let my mind raom.

And even when I did have the opportunity, I just couldn't bring my mind to do it. It's like my mind would just go blank. LOL. Totally blank. I don't know...

So what have I been doing?

Oh, going home, taking off everything and laying in my bed. For real. Tuesday night, I laid in my bed for 6 hours. LOL. I couldn't believe it myself. I was reading and watching tv and listening to music. All up in my bed. I swear, it felt so dman good! LOL. It just felt like I was living a life which was not my own. Luxurious.

And not for having nothing else to do. Simply for refusing to do anything else. Periot.

We had two days off last week because of a hurricane threat. I took that time to go around my room and dust. I still have the clothes everywhere to deal with. I'll tackle that mountain this weekend. And that'll be it up in there.

I am so apathetic about relationships and romance right about now. I just don't have it in me to care. And it's kinda frustrating, but then again, I'm feeling much less stress.

I don't know. I'm just floating along right now. Like a lily pad in a frog pond. Undisturbed. And enjoying it. Not loving it. But enjoying it.

The weekend's almost here and, outside of taxicabbing folks and cleaning, I don't have any plans. I'm thinking to go to a movie tomorrow night. I wouldn't mind dinner and a movie but, we'll see.

Like I said before: I. DON'T. KNOW.

the last - the next