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"All I got, all I got. This is all I got, all I got, all I got."

2006-04-28 - 4:56 p.m.

So yesterday, my momma wants to go to Winn Dixie 'cause they got cheese on sale 3 for $5 (which is a story in and of itself that involves me and always working, etc., etc. - for another day). So we take the regular route instead of the expressway which is a whole 4 minutes faster which means a lot to me when all I want to do is GET HOME (again, another story for another day).

So we get to Winn Dixie. As usual, she and I are bickering because she's casually strolling through the isles, not sticking to what she came to get, even though we are on a TIGHT schedule (this is a matter of me having time to change clothes, then go here!). We make it to the last stop, the bakery.

Neither of us needs anything there but I wanted to look for something to bring to work for my coworkers so I'm strolling and she's strolling on her own. When we first arrived in the area, I noticed a taller black male positioned near the bread. We were on the other side by the cakes and such. Like I said, I noticed him. But just like I "noticed" him, I "noticed" the family staked out in front of the bakery counter as well.

So I move to where the family is 'cause I'm lookin' for what I'm lookin' for. My momma moves to somewhere in the middle. Next thing I know, I see that black male from earlier in her immediate vicinity. Before I can even gauge the situation, my momma is coming over with the cart and a smile, talkin' 'bout "May I speak with you a moment." I knew right then and there I was about to get pissed off.

She proceeds to tell me that that black male wanted her to pass along the message for me to give my momma the cake and he would take me home...

First of all, Y-U-C-K!!!!! Second of all, how dare you approach my MOMMA with some foolishness like that KNOWING that she is my mother. Third of all, EFF YOU!

I was HEATED all over at the fact that he even said something like that to my momma. I was only a miff peeved at her for not going off on his ass, but not too much 'cause I could see that she found it VERY funny.

Then nigga had THE NERVE to come over and introduce himself. First question, asked CORNILY AS HAYLE!, "So, are you committed to anyone?" My DRY ASS and TO THE POINT (or so I thought) answer, "Yes I am." Nigga CONTINUES the questions, "So, how long have you been with this person?"

SKKKRRRTTT!

Who the HAYYYYLLLLLLE are YOU to be all up in my damn business. My answer to the first question should have been the end of the conversation! Why me?!?!

I proceeded to ROLL my damn eyes and say, "A while. And I am very comfortable in my relationship and not interested in anyone else." He gon' try to be funny and say, "Aww man! You just took my heart and threw it in that freezer behind you." while clutching his chest. I said, "Well, at least it's just frozen. You can get somebody else to come and thaw it out for you."

G-R-O-S-S! YUCK!

And to make matters worse, I was not attracted to him AT ALL. I mean, at least if I was attracted, the situation could have been flattering and MAYBE I coulda blushed. So that fact only added to my HEATEDNESS at the whole scene. ARRGGGHHHH!!!

My momma couldn't understand why I was so upset at first. She knows I'm not in a "relationship" with TheBouncer so I consider myself single. I had to break my anger down for her.

I explained to her the following reasons why I was upset about it:

1) That he came to her to pass a message to me. A GROWN MAN. KNOWING she is my mother, coming at her to discuss her daughter (me). Be for real!

2) I just TOLD his ass I'm in a relationship and he gon' try and CONTINUE to ask me questions, like some nigga in the bread aisle gon' be able to spit enough game to make me leave my "man". HELL NO! As soon as I said I was committed to somebody, his ass shoulda bid me a nice evening and went on 'bout his business. That REALLY pissed me off.

3) Why did he think I wanted to be bothered with some ess like that in the first place? Nigga, I'm grocery shopping in my work clothes WITH MY MOMMA! Do it look like I wanna be tryin' to holla at people right about now?! Is Winn Dixie the official pick-up spot and I just ain't get the damn memo?!? I TOLD my momma I would rather have gone to Publix, where niggas only chase you down and sneak and put they number in your basket.

A HILARIOUS moment between my mom and I on our way home from the store was her asking me, after I spewed all my wrath about what just happened, "Well, how would you want a man to approach you if he were interested? What could he say to get you? What are you looking for somebody to do?" I PROMPTLY proceeded to tell her that I AIN'T LOOKIN' FOR NOBODY! Her reaction was PRICELESS! I wish I had a video camera documenting that whole conversation. LOL!!!!!

I am really not interested in anything with anybody right about now. Even TheBouncer. I been trying to cut him loose and he 'bout to make it easy on me but I'll talk about that another time too.

But for real. I'm just ready to have time to think on everything else going on in my life without the dick distractions. It's gonna take me being celibate to do that but hey, that's just how it's gon' have to be.

And the FUNNIEST thing happened to me in the middle of the night.

My cell phone rang and I answered it 'cause to me, it had to be 5:30am or something and I figured somebody really needed something if they calling me at 5:30am.

I look at the number and realize it's that nigga G.O. L-O-L! That's "Young Buck" right there.

I messed around and let him have a taste of the A**** Experience. Nigga went and lost him damn mind offa that. I been tryin' to get rid of him since November. LOL! No lie! Callin' me (I later found out it was 3:45am - even worse), BEGGING ME to come through. Umm, that would be a no. Nigga got each of every last one of his feelings HURT when I outright laughed at all of the foolishness coming out of his mouth. And he had the nerve to get upset when I started laughing. I almost felt bad 'cause nigga started to really get sensitive but the ish he was saying was too funny not to laugh at.

It's harsh to say it but I hope I hurt his feelings enough for him to leave me the eff alone. STOP CALLING ME!

Niggas make you want to change yo damn numba!

Boy I tell you. What a day it is in the life of me. LOL.

So this weekend should be pretty quiet...for the most part anyway.

Tonight, I'm gonna be working at a Youth Talent Show with a caterer I know. I'm part of a wide web of people , so I get in where I fit in whenever I can. There's a piece of change in it for me too so it's all good.

I will PROMPTLY be taking my butt to sleep once that's over. Might even turn off my damn phone.

Tomorrow morning, I got quite a few things I need to do before 10am. I hope I get them all done too. Especially the passport situation. I NEED that to be done this weekend 'cause I cannot miss my flight to Costa Rica off some bull.

I got a MAJOR cleaning I need to take care off. I mean really. LOL. I just need to get it done and out of the way and I can see that taking up my entire day. But it's gotta be done so it's whatever.

Sunday, Sunday School and the theatre and finishing up some thangs.

I've got a new schedule for my life I wanna try and implement come Monday. I have to prepare over the weekend for it.

I'm gettin' nervous about the whole "apartment" situation. The Lord knows what I want and I trust him to provide. "Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen." Gotta remember that. It's so hard to get over the human mind and completely embrace a mind of Faith, but that's what I gotta do. Like Amel Larrieux says it's "all I got, all I got."

the last - the next

The Trees Today - The Trees I've Seent. - Diaryland.


The Last 5 Trees
"Until the end of time, I'll be there for you. You are my heart and mind. I truly adore you." - Sunday, Oct. 30, 2016
"Don't touch what's there...when it's the feelings I wear..." - Saturday, Oct. 08, 2016
"I will enter his gates with thanksgiving in my heart, I will enter his courts with praise." - Friday, Oct. 07, 2016
"I tried to run it away. Thought then my head'd be feeling clearer...." - Tuesday, Oct. 04, 2016
"Boy, your money and my money? Ain't the same damn kind. I can live your life and my life AT THE SAME DAMN TIME!" - Sunday, Oct. 02, 2016