2005-02-02 - 12:05 a.m.

So I've been going to the gym steadily at the crack of dawn for the past week and a half. Not Saturday and Sunday, of course there was no time for that on the weekend even though I only left my house once and that was late Saturday night... But other than that, I've been really diligent about that gym.

It's like D said, ain't nothin' else to do in the gym but work out so if I go there, I'm definitely going to do what I have to do.

I really like it so far. I mean, for me to get up at the crack of dawn when I don't have to just so I can go work out? I must like it.

My boss started really getting on my damn nerves yesterday and it kept going until it just got to the point where today, I damn-near let him have it. It wasn't in his favor that my damn period started today (early!) either. I explained to him that I always think about quitting but I won't 'cause I don't want to right about now. But I also let him know that my damn peace is in jeopardy because of him all the damn time and I don't appreciate that.

We'll see where it goes. Alls I know is that I am going to make a concerted effort to not think about work until I get to the office and not think about work after I leave the office for the day. That's where my success in my position will come from.

2 more days until my 6th month anniversary of celibacy. It's crazy. I can't believe this time has flown by like that. LOL. And The Bouncer still calls damn near everyday. LOL.

I'm so sleepy right now.

Okay, what the hell do I have to talk about? Nothing really. LOL.

I'm doing pretty well this year so far about not absorbing people's problems and putting my foot down when I feel like it. And that's feeling good.

What's also feeling good is that I haven't spoken to Jerramy in a month today. I'm not gon' sit here and lie and say I don't think about him everyday and I don't have to stop myself from calling him more than I appreciate. I'm not gon' do that. I am gonna say that it feels good the next day when I realize that I had enough control over myself that I didn't give into those desires to hear his voice or see him. 'Cause they're not good desires for me to have.

Just don't make sense. I'm getting stronger though. That makes me happy.

I went and got my hair done on a real whim on my way home Friday night. Took one hour. One hour. That place is my official place from now on. And I'm gonna go the last Friday of every month, schedule permitting.

I wanna get real scheduled this year. Everything in my planner. Everything.

Anyway, my eyes are closing and the only real thing going on in my life right now is this going to the gym thing and I already have my focus on that somewhere else so I'ma head on outta here for now. I'll be back soon. Like, next week or something. LOL.

Naw, I'll be back sooner than that. Especially if something exciting happens...yeah right.

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